Published Wednesday, May 14, 2025
Having open conversations about anxiety in children helps normalize big emotions. When your child's anxiety is acknowledged, it becomes easier to manage and support.
Having open conversations about anxiety in children helps normalize big emotions. When your child's anxiety is acknowledged, it becomes easier to manage and support.
Mental health is just as important as brushing teeth or eating veggies. But many parents don’t talk about it. Maybe it feels scary. Maybe they don’t know how.
But here’s the truth: if we talk early, we help our kids feel safe. We stop fear before it grows. And it teaches coping skills they’ll use even as adults.
Many children have a hard time with anxiety. But they keep it a secret. They don’t want to feel different. Or weak.
Let’s change that. Here’s why:
Almost 1 in 7 kids and teens deal with mental health struggles. That’s a lot. Things like depression, anxiety, or feeling very worried.
If your child feels anxious, they’re not alone.
Some kids stay quiet. They’re scared to be judged. But talking tells them: it’s okay to feel big feelings.
Talking shows them it’s normal to have struggles—and it’s not their fault. It’s not something to be ashamed of.
It’s okay to say, “I feel anxious.” It’s okay to ask for help.
This shows them it’s normal to feel anxious, and it helps them feel safe enough to open up too.
When we help early, things get better later.
Research shows that early support can mean fewer delays in getting help, like not having to wait months to see a counselor.
They ease symptoms. They boost mental health and well-being. And here’s the best part—Young people say these models feel right for them.
If a child has physical symptoms or feels scared a lot, they need help now. Just a few talks or tools can help them manage anxiety for life.
When you listen, your child feels safe. When you talk, they learn they can come to you—no matter what. That trust lasts a lifetime.
Noticing the signs of anxiety in your child early—like clinginess, restlessness, or unexplained crying—can help you support them before panic attacks start. Source: Very Well Health
Noticing the signs of anxiety in your child early—like clinginess, restlessness, or unexplained crying—can help you support them before panic attacks start. Source: Very Well Health
Seeing signs early matters—but knowing when to ask for help is just as important.
If you're unsure, start by writing down when and how often symptoms show up.
This record can help a mental health professional understand what your child is going through and guide the best next steps.
These are real. Even if no one sees it, your child feels it. Knowing what to look for is the first step in helping them feel safe.
When does a child’s worry become something more? If your child's anxiety feels constant or impacts daily life, it may be time to seek helpful support.
When does a child’s worry become something more? If your child's anxiety feels constant or impacts daily life, it may be time to seek helpful support.
It's normal for kids to feel nervous before a school presentation or anxious before a sleepover. But when that worry becomes constant, disruptive, or filled with intense fear, it could be a sign of an anxiety disorder.
Here are a few signs it may be time to consider professional help:
These signs are hard. But they’re treatable. A few therapy sessions can help your child learn how to handle anxious thoughts and feel safe again.
Many children experience anxiety when life feels uncertain. Big changes—like moving—can trigger a child’s anxiety and lead to panic or withdrawal.
Many children experience anxiety when life feels uncertain. Big changes—like moving—can trigger a child’s anxiety and lead to panic or withdrawal.
Knowing what sets off your child's anxiety helps you prepare. You can’t stop every trigger—but you can help them feel safer and more in control.
Even good changes can feel scary. Kids crave stability. Big shifts shake it.
Triggers include:
Big changes can make children feel unsafe. Their anxious symptoms often grow quietly in the chaos.
Children, especially younger children, like to know what happens next. Surprises? Not their favorite thing.
Triggers include:
When the script changes, anxious kids panic. The unknown feels like a threat.
Grief is a major trigger of anxiety in children. When loss touches a family, many children struggle silently—asking “what ifs,” feeling scared, or withdrawing emotionally.
Grief is a major trigger of anxiety in children. When loss touches a family, many children struggle silently—asking “what ifs,” feeling scared, or withdrawing emotionally.
When kids miss someone they love, they may feel anxious.
Triggers include:
Anxious kids may not cry. They may worry, cling, or ask endless “what ifs.”
Kids feel what their family members feel. If the house is heavy with tension, your child may act out or hide away.
Triggers include:
Sometimes a child’s anxiety is about what’s happening at home. They may shut down or act out, but inside, they’re trying to make sense of a storm they didn’t cause.
Talking to your child about anxiety doesn’t need to be perfect. It just needs to feel safe. Kids at different ages open up in different ways. Your tone matters. Your calm helps them calm down.
The goal is simple: help your child feel safe and understood.
When a child’s anxiety shows up at school, they might not have the words to explain it. Helping them open up—gently and clearly—is the first step to something helpful.
When a child’s anxiety shows up at school, they might not have the words to explain it. Helping them open up—gently and clearly—is the first step to something helpful.
Some kids can’t explain their feelings yet. That’s why we teach them about anxiety step-by-step.
Start by gently naming what you see.
“I noticed this morning before school, you looked really quiet and didn’t want to get out of bed. Sometimes that happens when people feel nervous about going to school. What was going through your mind?”
Share your own experiences to normalize theirs.
“When I was your age, I felt nervous about going to school sometimes, too—especially on days with tests or presentations. Do you ever feel that way”
“Some kids feel anxious when the teacher calls on them in class or when they have to talk in front of the room. Have you ever felt that way at school?”
Be extra clear with younger children.
“Some kids are scared of the dark, or loud noises. Are there things like that that make you feel nervous?”
Show them their feelings are real.
“I believe you. Feeling nervous is okay. It’s a natural reaction. I’m here to help.”
Once your child feels heard, it’s time to explain what anxiety really is—and why it happens. These two short videos are excellent visual tools for explaining the “fight, flight, or freeze” response:
Then talk about the three parts of anxiety:
Thoughts (what we say to ourselves); physical feelings (how our body responds); and behaviors (what we do or our actions).
A good way to describe the interconnection of these parts is to draw a triangle with arrows (see image below).
When teaching a child about anxiety, this simple triangle model helps them understand how their thoughts, physical feelings, and behaviors all connect—and how to manage them.
When teaching a child about anxiety, this simple triangle model helps them understand how their thoughts, physical feelings, and behaviors all connect—and how to manage them.
Once they know what anxiety is, teach them how to spot it.
Here are four truths your child should know:
By talking about mental health, now, your child learns to name feelings and ask for help. These skills grow with them, making it easier to handle stress and life changes later on.
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These creative, kid-friendly breathing exercises can help many children manage stress and regulate their emotions when they're worried or overstimulated.
These creative, kid-friendly breathing exercises can help many children manage stress and regulate their emotions when they're worried or overstimulated.
Deep breathing and mindfulness are two gentle tools that can help your anxious child feel better. Practicing these tools at home with a calm adult—like a parent or close friend—can really help. Even just a few sessions can go a long way in helping your child learn coping skills they can use every day.
Just 10 minutes of focused breathing can help your child feel grounded, calm, and safe—even when they’re feeling worried or overwhelmed. Here are simple techniques you can teach anytime, anywhere.
Practicing breathing together helps many children build emotional regulation and reassures them it’s okay to feel worried or overwhelmed.
Practicing breathing together helps many children build emotional regulation and reassures them it’s okay to feel worried or overwhelmed.
The best way for a child to start learning coping skills is by watching someone they trust. Sit down together. Breathe together. Let them know it’s okay to be worried, and that breathing is one of many tools they can reach for when they need it.
You can also model these techniques during your own stressful moments. Try saying out loud, “I’m feeling nervous about my meeting, so I’m going to do some deep breathing,” while driving your child to school.
The more you practice with them, the more they’ll remember to use these skills later—like during therapy sessions or in tough moments during their child’s life.
Helping your child feel safe, calm, and supported starts with small steps—and these breathing tools are a great place to begin.
When many children can’t name their emotions, acting out tough moments gives them words and confidence. It also builds helpful coping skills they can use when feeling worried or overwhelmed.
When many children can’t name their emotions, acting out tough moments gives them words and confidence. It also builds helpful coping skills they can use when feeling worried or overwhelmed.
Kids don’t always know how to talk about what they feel—especially when they’re experiencing anxiety in new or uncomfortable moments. That’s why role play can be so powerful. It gives children a safe and playful space to explore tough emotions like anxiety in children. Acting out stressful situations—like walking into a new school, going to a sleepover, or speaking in front of other kids—helps them name what they feel and practice how to respond.
Through role play, kids learn how to:
These become real coping skills your child can use when it matters.
Practicing how to ask to join in, talk to other children, or express vulnerability helps many children feel more confident. These scripts are especially helpful for older kids who experience panic attacks or feel stuck in new situations.
Practicing how to ask to join in, talk to other children, or express vulnerability helps many children feel more confident. These scripts are especially helpful for older kids who experience panic attacks or feel stuck in new situations.
Try acting out:
Some conversations—especially about panic attacks, mental illness, or fears—can feel scary for children. But role play makes them less intimidating. Practicing ahead of time helps your anxious child feel more confident when those moments really happen.
You can model helpful phrases like:
Role play also builds connection. When your child sees you listening and supporting them, they feel more open to sharing in the future.
And it's not just for kids—many adults do it too. We rehearse phone calls before making them or check where to park before going somewhere new. It's how we prepare. So when kids role play, they're learning real-life tools just like we do.
Sometimes, it’s hard to know if your child is just nervous—or if it’s more. Some kids feel better with hugs and talks at home. But others need extra help. If your child has anxiety that won’t go away, it may be time for treatment.
Therapy provides a helpful, structured space for learning coping skills, practicing new strategies, and gradually working through stressful situations in a safe and supportive way.
Getting extra help doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong. It means you care. A mental health professional can teach your child coping skills that help them feel better in daily life.
Introducing a mental health professional doesn’t need to feel clinical or cold. For many children, talking about their anxiety can begin with play, connection, and a safe adult who listens.
Introducing a mental health professional doesn’t need to feel clinical or cold. For many children, talking about their anxiety can begin with play, connection, and a safe adult who listens.
If your child is showing signs of an anxiety disorder, the idea of therapy sessions might feel scary to them at first. Here’s how you can gently introduce the idea:
Whether your child is facing daily worry, social anxiety, or deeper struggles, reaching out for help shows strength—not weakness. And it reminds your child that with the right support, they don’t have to face their fears alone.
If you’re a parent worried about your child, you’re not the only one. Anxiety in children is more common than people think. It might show up as tummy aches, headaches, tears, or silence. These are real anxious symptoms. They need care—not to be brushed off.
With older children, the signs can be harder to see. You might not notice until daily life or school becomes a struggle. That’s why talking early, giving steady support, and trying treatment when needed is so important.
There’s no single answer that works for every child. But there are always ways to help your child—like using calming tools, having regular talks, or getting professional help. Every small step counts.
And don’t forget this: your love, your time, and your encouragement? They matter most. You’re not just helping your child feel less anxious. You’re helping them grow strong and brave for life ahead.
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Zion Rosareal
I believe that words are more than just tools—they’re bridges connecting ideas, emotions, and people. I thrive where art meets strategy, blending creativity with purpose. A lifelong learner, I'm always exploring new ways to bring ideas to life. Beyond writing, I enjoy playing Chess, Monopoly, and taking performing arts workshops.
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