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Published Wednesday, May 14, 2025

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Key Takeaways

  • Anxiety in children can show up in many ways—like tummy aches, sadness, or fear. For some, it may even lead to separation anxiety or sudden panic attacks, especially during new or stressful moments.
  • It's essential for parents to recognize that these feelings are normal for many young people, especially when facing significant changes or challenging social situations, like starting school or meeting new friends.
  • There are many ways to treat anxiety—from simple breathing tools to talking with a trusted adult or therapist. Even small steps can be very helpful.
  • If your child seems extra worried, don't ignore it. Help them feel safe, heard, and supported. They don't have to go through it alone—and neither do you.

Why Talking About Mental Health with Kids is Important

A concerned therapist gently places a hand on a young boy’s back while he covers his face with his hands, showing visible distress in a group therapy setting.

Having open conversations about anxiety in children helps normalize big emotions. When your child's anxiety is acknowledged, it becomes easier to manage and support.

A concerned therapist gently places a hand on a young boy’s back while he covers his face with his hands, showing visible distress in a group therapy setting.

Having open conversations about anxiety in children helps normalize big emotions. When your child's anxiety is acknowledged, it becomes easier to manage and support.

Mental health is just as important as brushing teeth or eating veggies. But many parents don’t talk about it. Maybe it feels scary. Maybe they don’t know how.

But here’s the truth: if we talk early, we help our kids feel safe. We stop fear before it grows. And it teaches coping skills they’ll use even as adults.

Many children have a hard time with anxiety. But they keep it a secret. They don’t want to feel different. Or weak.

Let’s change that. Here’s why:

Mental Health Struggles Are More Common Than You Think

Almost 1 in 7 kids and teens deal with mental health struggles. That’s a lot. Things like depression, anxiety, or feeling very worried.

If your child feels anxious, they’re not alone.

Some kids stay quiet. They’re scared to be judged. But talking tells them: it’s okay to feel big feelings.

Talking shows them it’s normal to have struggles—and it’s not their fault. It’s not something to be ashamed of.

It’s okay to say, “I feel anxious.” It’s okay to ask for help.

This shows them it’s normal to feel anxious, and it helps them feel safe enough to open up too.

Early Support Can Change the Future

When we help early, things get better later.

Research shows that early support can mean fewer delays in getting help, like not having to wait months to see a counselor.

They ease symptoms. They boost mental health and well-being. And here’s the best part—Young people say these models feel right for them.

​ If a child has physical symptoms or feels scared a lot, they need help now. Just a few talks or tools can help them manage anxiety for life.

It Builds Trust and Strengthens Your Bond

When you listen, your child feels safe. When you talk, they learn they can come to you—no matter what. That trust lasts a lifetime.

Is Your Child Anxious? Spotting Signs of Anxiety in Children

An infographic titled “Children With Anxiety May…” shows illustrations of children experiencing symptoms of anxiety such as clinginess, restlessness, stomachaches, eating and sleeping changes, negative thoughts, quick anger, unexplained crying, and trouble concentrating

Noticing the signs of anxiety in your child early—like clinginess, restlessness, or unexplained crying—can help you support them before panic attacks start. Source: Very Well Health

An infographic titled “Children With Anxiety May…” shows illustrations of children experiencing symptoms of anxiety such as clinginess, restlessness, stomachaches, eating and sleeping changes, negative thoughts, quick anger, unexplained crying, and trouble concentrating

Noticing the signs of anxiety in your child early—like clinginess, restlessness, or unexplained crying—can help you support them before panic attacks start. Source: Very Well Health

Seeing signs early matters—but knowing when to ask for help is just as important.

If you're unsure, start by writing down when and how often symptoms show up.

This record can help a mental health professional understand what your child is going through and guide the best next steps.

Emotional and Behavioral Signs

  • Stops doing things they used to like
    They don’t want to play anymore. The fun things feel too hard now.
  • Doesn’t want to talk or go to school
    They avoid people. They say they feel “off” or just want to stay home.
  • Cries a lot, gets mad quickly, clings to parents
    Their feelings come out fast. Big tears. Big anger. And they don’t want to let you go.
  • Can’t sleep, mind won’t stop
    Bedtime takes forever. They are always worried about burglars, fires, or you not coming back. Sleep doesn’t feel safe.
  • Separation anxiety, especially in younger children
    They panic when it’s time to say goodbye—even for short things like school drop-off or errands.

Physical Signs

  • Stomach hurts, head hurts, feels sick
    They say their belly or head aches, especially before school or new things.
  • Sweaty hands, dry mouth
    Their hands feel wet. They always feel thirsty
  • Shaky body or dizzy
    They say they feel wobbly or like the room is spinning.
  • Trouble breathing or a racing heart
    Chest feels tight. They might say, “I can’t breathe right.”​
  • Weird stomach feelings
    “Butterflies.” “Flips.” “It’s weird down there.” It’s their way of saying they’re anxious.

These are real. Even if no one sees it, your child feels it. Knowing what to look for is the first step in helping them feel safe.

Normal Worry or Anxiety Disorder? What is the Difference

A Venn diagram compares anxiety and worry. Anxiety is described as persistent, unchanging, and overwhelming; worry is temporary and situational. Both involve fear or concern for people and situations.

When does a child’s worry become something more? If your child's anxiety feels constant or impacts daily life, it may be time to seek helpful support.

A Venn diagram compares anxiety and worry. Anxiety is described as persistent, unchanging, and overwhelming; worry is temporary and situational. Both involve fear or concern for people and situations.

When does a child’s worry become something more? If your child's anxiety feels constant or impacts daily life, it may be time to seek helpful support.

It's normal for kids to feel nervous before a school presentation or anxious before a sleepover. But when that worry becomes constant, disruptive, or filled with intense fear, it could be a sign of an anxiety disorder.

​Here are a few signs it may be time to consider professional help:

  • Your child avoids school, birthday parties, or other social settings they once enjoyed.
  • They experience frequent physical symptoms like headaches or stomachaches with no clear cause.
  • They express ongoing social anxiety, fear of being judged, or deep discomfort around others.
  • Their child's teacher or school counselor has noticed changes in mood, focus, or classroom behavior.
  • They seem emotionally stuck—unable to bounce back from small challenges or everyday frustrations.

These signs are hard. But they’re treatable. A few therapy sessions can help your child learn how to handle anxious thoughts and feel safe again.

What Makes a Child Feel Anxious? Common Triggers of Your Child’s Anxiety

A young boy sits curled up inside a cardboard box looking anxious, while a woman, possibly his mother, rests her head in her hand on the floor next to him, appearing concerned.

Many children experience anxiety when life feels uncertain. Big changes—like moving—can trigger a child’s anxiety and lead to panic or withdrawal.

A young boy sits curled up inside a cardboard box looking anxious, while a woman, possibly his mother, rests her head in her hand on the floor next to him, appearing concerned.

Many children experience anxiety when life feels uncertain. Big changes—like moving—can trigger a child’s anxiety and lead to panic or withdrawal.

Knowing what sets off your child's anxiety helps you prepare. You can’t stop every trigger—but you can help them feel safer and more in control.

1. Big Life Changes

Even good changes can feel scary. Kids crave stability. Big shifts shake it.

​Triggers include:

  • Moving to a new home or school
  • Parents getting divorced or remarried
  • Losing a pet or a loved one
  • New baby in the house
  • A parent moving away or going to jail

Big changes can make children feel unsafe. Their anxious symptoms often grow quietly in the chaos.

2. Disruptions in Routine

Children, especially younger children, like to know what happens next. Surprises? Not their favorite thing.

​Triggers include:

  • Changes in a parent's work schedule
  • Vacation or unexpected trips
  • Sleepovers or being away from home
  • Plans changing at the last minute
  • Getting in trouble at home or unexpected punishment.

When the script changes, anxious kids panic. The unknown feels like a threat.

3. Grief and Loss

A group of mourners dressed in black stand under umbrellas at a funeral. A woman and an older woman embrace tightly in the center, while a young blonde girl in the foreground looks down with a somber expression.

Grief is a major trigger of anxiety in children. When loss touches a family, many children struggle silently—asking “what ifs,” feeling scared, or withdrawing emotionally.

A group of mourners dressed in black stand under umbrellas at a funeral. A woman and an older woman embrace tightly in the center, while a young blonde girl in the foreground looks down with a somber expression.

Grief is a major trigger of anxiety in children. When loss touches a family, many children struggle silently—asking “what ifs,” feeling scared, or withdrawing emotionally.

When kids miss someone they love, they may feel anxious.

​Triggers include:

  • Watching a show or reading a book about death
  • Holidays or birthdays without someone special
  • Talking about sad events in class
  • Visiting places tied to a person they miss

Anxious kids may not cry. They may worry, cling, or ask endless “what ifs.”

4. Family Stress at Home

Kids feel what their family members feel. If the house is heavy with tension, your child may act out or hide away.

​Triggers include:

  • Someone at home is struggling with a mental illness
  • A parent lost a job
  • The home feels heavy with stress, grief, or fear
  • Parents are fighting
  • Discrimination or emotional trauma touches the family

Sometimes a child’s anxiety is about what’s happening at home. They may shut down or act out, but inside, they’re trying to make sense of a storm they didn’t cause.

How to Help My Kid With Anxiety During Talks

Talking to your child about anxiety doesn’t need to be perfect. It just needs to feel safe. Kids at different ages open up in different ways. Your tone matters. Your calm helps them calm down.

The goal is simple: help your child feel safe and understood.

A young girl sits alone in a school hallway, hugging her backpack tightly with a worried look on her face. Red lockers line the wall in the background.

When a child’s anxiety shows up at school, they might not have the words to explain it. Helping them open up—gently and clearly—is the first step to something helpful.

A young girl sits alone in a school hallway, hugging her backpack tightly with a worried look on her face. Red lockers line the wall in the background.

When a child’s anxiety shows up at school, they might not have the words to explain it. Helping them open up—gently and clearly—is the first step to something helpful.

Some kids can’t explain their feelings yet. That’s why we teach them about anxiety step-by-step.

Step 1: Help Them Open Up

Start by gently naming what you see.

“I noticed this morning before school, you looked really quiet and didn’t want to get out of bed. Sometimes that happens when people feel nervous about going to school. What was going through your mind?”

Share your own experiences to normalize theirs.

“When I was your age, I felt nervous about going to school sometimes, too—especially on days with tests or presentations. Do you ever feel that way”

“Some kids feel anxious when the teacher calls on them in class or when they have to talk in front of the room. Have you ever felt that way at school?”

Be extra clear with younger children.

“Some kids are scared of the dark, or loud noises. Are there things like that that make you feel nervous?”

Show them their feelings are real.

“I believe you. Feeling nervous is okay. It’s a natural reaction. I’m here to help.”

Step 2: Teaching Your Child About Anxiety

Once your child feels heard, it’s time to explain what anxiety really is—and why it happens. These two short videos are excellent visual tools for explaining the “fight, flight, or freeze” response:

Then talk about the three parts of anxiety:

Thoughts (what we say to ourselves); physical feelings (how our body responds); and behaviors (what we do or our actions).

  • Thoughts: "What if I mess up?"
  • Feelings: A racing heart, sweaty hands, stomachaches
  • Behaviors: Crying, freezing, hiding, or wanting to leave

A good way to describe the interconnection of these parts is to draw a triangle with arrows (see image below).

A diagram shows a triangle connecting three parts of anxiety: "Thoughts" (e.g. “what if mom doesn’t come home?”), "Physical feelings" (e.g. tummy ache, headache, heart racing), and "Behaviours" (e.g. finding mom, staying home from school). Each point is connected with arrows, indicating the cycle of anxiety.

When teaching a child about anxiety, this simple triangle model helps them understand how their thoughts, physical feelings, and behaviors all connect—and how to manage them.

A diagram shows a triangle connecting three parts of anxiety: "Thoughts" (e.g. “what if mom doesn’t come home?”), "Physical feelings" (e.g. tummy ache, headache, heart racing), and "Behaviours" (e.g. finding mom, staying home from school). Each point is connected with arrows, indicating the cycle of anxiety.

When teaching a child about anxiety, this simple triangle model helps them understand how their thoughts, physical feelings, and behaviors all connect—and how to manage them.

Step 3: Helping Your Child Recognize Anxiety

Once they know what anxiety is, teach them how to spot it.

Here are four truths your child should know:

  • Anxiety is normal. Even most children feel it. It shows up before a test, on a rollercoaster, or when something new happens.
  • Anxiety is not dangerousIt feels big, but it goes away. What feels scary now won't stay that way.
  • Anxiety is helpful. It keeps us alert. Like before a speech or a sports game. This is called anxious arousal.  It means your brain is telling your body to get ready. Your heart beats faster, your muscles tighten, and you focus more. It's your body's way of helping you stay safe and do your best.
  • Anxiety can be managed. There are tools that help—like deep breathing, talking, or support from a mental health professional. Even just a few sessions can help.

By talking about mental health, now, your child learns to name feelings and ask for help. These skills grow with them, making it easier to handle stress and life changes later on.

Help Your Child Using Deep Breathing and Mindfulness Together

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An overhead view of colorful illustrated cards titled "28 Breathing Exercises for Kids." Each card features a unique breathing technique like “Superhero Breathing,” “Grateful Breathing,” “Ocean Breathing,” and “Rainbow Breathing,” with simple instructions and matching kid-friendly illustrations.

These creative, kid-friendly breathing exercises can help many children manage stress and regulate their emotions when they're worried or overstimulated.

An overhead view of colorful illustrated cards titled "28 Breathing Exercises for Kids." Each card features a unique breathing technique like “Superhero Breathing,” “Grateful Breathing,” “Ocean Breathing,” and “Rainbow Breathing,” with simple instructions and matching kid-friendly illustrations.

These creative, kid-friendly breathing exercises can help many children manage stress and regulate their emotions when they're worried or overstimulated.

Deep breathing and mindfulness are two gentle tools that can help your anxious child feel better. Practicing these tools at home with a calm adult—like a parent or close friend—can really help. Even just a few sessions can go a long way in helping your child learn coping skills they can use every day.

Simple Breathing Exercises to Ease Anxiety

Just 10 minutes of focused breathing can help your child feel grounded, calm, and safe—even when they’re feeling worried or overwhelmed. Here are simple techniques you can teach anytime, anywhere.

  • 4-7-8 Breathing
    Inhale for 4 seconds. Hold for 7. Slowly exhale for 8.
    Slows the heartbeat and quiets racing thoughts. Perfect before bed or a big test.
  • Box Breathing (Square Breathing)
    Inhale for 4 seconds. Hold for 4. Exhale for 4. Hold for 4.
    Repeat 3–5 times. Great after meltdowns or stressful moments.
  • Belly Breathing (Diaphragmatic Breathing)
    Have your child put one hand on their belly. Breathe in, feel it rise. Breathe out, feel it fall.
    This teaches body awareness and gives a sense of control.
  • Resonance Breathing
    Inhale for 6 seconds. Pause. Exhale for 6.
    Steady and slow. Calms the nervous system, especially when anxiety causes shortness of breath.
  • Alternate Nostril Breathing
    Close one nostril. Breathe in through the other. Switch sides. Breathe out.
    Helps with focus and calming overstimulation.
  • Pursed Lip Breathing
    Inhale through the nose. Exhale slowly through pursed lips (like blowing out a candle).
    Slows fast breathing and eases panic.

Practicing Coping Mechanisms Side-by-Side is Important

Mother and daughter sitting cross-legged on yoga mats with eyes closed, practicing deep breathing with one hand on chest and one on belly—an at-home mindfulness exercise to help kids with anxiety and introduce mental health conversations.

Practicing breathing together helps many children build emotional regulation and reassures them it’s okay to feel worried or overwhelmed.

Mother and daughter sitting cross-legged on yoga mats with eyes closed, practicing deep breathing with one hand on chest and one on belly—an at-home mindfulness exercise to help kids with anxiety and introduce mental health conversations.

Practicing breathing together helps many children build emotional regulation and reassures them it’s okay to feel worried or overwhelmed.

The best way for a child to start learning coping skills is by watching someone they trust. Sit down together. Breathe together. Let them know it’s okay to be worried, and that breathing is one of many tools they can reach for when they need it.

You can also model these techniques during your own stressful moments. Try saying out loud, “I’m feeling nervous about my meeting, so I’m going to do some deep breathing,” while driving your child to school.

The more you practice with them, the more they’ll remember to use these skills later—like during therapy sessions or in tough moments during their child’s life.

Helping your child feel safe, calm, and supported starts with small steps—and these breathing tools are a great place to begin.

When Role Play Can Help Communication

Mother and daughter role-playing a conversation on the couch to prepare for an anxiety-inducing situation—supportive parenting technique for helping kids manage anxiety and understand mental health.

When many children can’t name their emotions, acting out tough moments gives them words and confidence. It also builds helpful coping skills they can use when feeling worried or overwhelmed.

Mother and daughter role-playing a conversation on the couch to prepare for an anxiety-inducing situation—supportive parenting technique for helping kids manage anxiety and understand mental health.

When many children can’t name their emotions, acting out tough moments gives them words and confidence. It also builds helpful coping skills they can use when feeling worried or overwhelmed.

Kids don’t always know how to talk about what they feel—especially when they’re experiencing anxiety in new or uncomfortable moments. That’s why role play can be so powerful. It gives children a safe and playful space to explore tough emotions like anxiety in children. Acting out stressful situations—like walking into a new school, going to a sleepover, or speaking in front of other kids—helps them name what they feel and practice how to respond.

Through role play, kids learn how to:

  • Talk about what makes young people feel worried
  • Practice deep breaths and asking for help during social situations
  • Build tools they can use in real life—at school, at home, or during treatment

These become real coping skills your child can use when it matters.

Examples of Anxiety Scenarios to Practice

An illustrated social skills chart titled “Meet New Friends Role Playing” shows six categories of conversation starters for kids. Prompts include how to ask to join in, offer to include others, look for similarity, be open, ask questions, and give compliments—designed to help children practice friendly interactions in social scenarios.

Practicing how to ask to join in, talk to other children, or express vulnerability helps many children feel more confident. These scripts are especially helpful for older kids who experience panic attacks or feel stuck in new situations.

An illustrated social skills chart titled “Meet New Friends Role Playing” shows six categories of conversation starters for kids. Prompts include how to ask to join in, offer to include others, look for similarity, be open, ask questions, and give compliments—designed to help children practice friendly interactions in social scenarios.

Practicing how to ask to join in, talk to other children, or express vulnerability helps many children feel more confident. These scripts are especially helpful for older kids who experience panic attacks or feel stuck in new situations.

Try acting out:

  • A first day in a new classroom
  • Asking the child's teacher for a break during a tough day
  • Saying "I feel nervous" to a close friend
  • Giving a class presentation or project
  • Asking another kid to play on the playground
  • Asking family members or other caregivers for support

Why Role Play Works

Some conversations—especially about panic attacks, mental illness, or fears—can feel scary for children. But role play makes them less intimidating. Practicing ahead of time helps your anxious child feel more confident when those moments really happen.

You can model helpful phrases like:

  • "I feel anxious and need a break"
  • "Can I talk to someone?"
  • "I'm nervous, but I'll try."

Role play also builds connection. When your child sees you listening and supporting them, they feel more open to sharing in the future.

And it's not just for kids—many adults do it too. We rehearse phone calls before making them or check where to park before going somewhere new. It's how we prepare. So when kids role play, they're learning real-life tools just like we do.

Knowing When to Seek Professional Help

Sometimes, it’s hard to know if your child is just nervous—or if it’s more. Some kids feel better with hugs and talks at home. But others need extra help. If your child has anxiety that won’t go away, it may be time for treatment.

Therapy provides a helpful, structured space for learning coping skills, practicing new strategies, and gradually working through stressful situations in a safe and supportive way.

​Getting extra help doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong. It means you care. A mental health professional can teach your child coping skills that help them feel better in daily life.

How to Involve Mental Health Professionals Gently

Child psychologist using play therapy with a young girl during a session—helping children express emotions, reduce anxiety, and learn how to talk about mental health in a safe environment.

Introducing a mental health professional doesn’t need to feel clinical or cold. For many children, talking about their anxiety can begin with play, connection, and a safe adult who listens.

Child psychologist using play therapy with a young girl during a session—helping children express emotions, reduce anxiety, and learn how to talk about mental health in a safe environment.

Introducing a mental health professional doesn’t need to feel clinical or cold. For many children, talking about their anxiety can begin with play, connection, and a safe adult who listens.

If your child is showing signs of an anxiety disorder, the idea of therapy sessions might feel scary to them at first. Here’s how you can gently introduce the idea:

  • Normalize it: "Sometimes we all need help with big feelings—just like we go to the doctor for a cough, we can talk to someone about worries too."
  • Encourage in open conversation: Explain that a counselor's job is to help, not to judge, and that they won't have to talk about anything they're not ready to.
  • Utilize school support: A meeting with your child's teacher, school counselor, or psychologist can help ease the process and provide valuable insights.
  • Encourage small steps: Even attending just a few sessions can build trust, offer emotional relief, and begin to reduce symptoms of anxiety.
  • Share your own experience: Let your child know if you've talked to a therapist or felt anxious before. It shows them it's okay and that support helps at any age.

Whether your child is facing daily worry, social anxiety, or deeper struggles, reaching out for help shows strength—not weakness. And it reminds your child that with the right support, they don’t have to face their fears alone.

Final Words

If you’re a parent worried about your child, you’re not the only one. Anxiety in children is more common than people think. It might show up as tummy aches, headaches, tears, or silence. These are real anxious symptoms. They need care—not to be brushed off.

With older children, the signs can be harder to see. You might not notice until daily life or school becomes a struggle. That’s why talking early, giving steady support, and trying treatment when needed is so important.

There’s no single answer that works for every child. But there are always ways to help your child—like using calming tools, having regular talks, or getting professional help. Every small step counts.

And don’t forget this: your love, your time, and your encouragement? They matter most. You’re not just helping your child feel less anxious. You’re helping them grow strong and brave for life ahead.

Resources

National Alliance on Mental Illness Helpline
(NAMI)

1-800-950-NAMI (6264)

Mental health support, education, and next steps.

Teen Helpline

1-800-852-8336
​Text TEEN to 839863

Peer-to-peer support from trained teens who understand what you're going through.

Zion Rosareal

I believe that words are more than just tools—they’re bridges connecting ideas, emotions, and people. I thrive where art meets strategy, blending creativity with purpose. A lifelong learner, I'm always exploring new ways to bring ideas to life. Beyond writing, I enjoy playing Chess, Monopoly, and taking performing arts workshops.

 Type 5 Investigator / ENFP Campaigner

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